To Perpetuate A Host Club
by Eria
Summary: Morinozuka and Haninozuka have graduated leaving the rest of the Host Club members scuffling to replace the spots they have vacated.
1. Unhappy Junio

_Author's notes: So the inspiration here was 'what would happen when the Host Club matured another year?'. Hilarity ensues, that's what. XD ... I am assuming here that Nekozawa is the same age as Kyouya and Tamaki, but that may be wrong. Please ignore this discrepancy if it is indeed wrong. XD; I may just add in a detail of Nekozawa being held back a year if that is true. D:_

* * *

It was like any typical afternoon with the prestigious Host Club. Clients fawned over their respective Host(s) and preened over compliments. The theme had been "Pretty Boy Transformations" in lieu of the new school year. Tamaki had been fretting over who would replace the positions that Mori and Honey had vacated upon graduation, and had convinced the club members that this would help recruit new members. The club had encouraged clients to bring presentable freshman boys to 'transform' into Hosts for five minutes. Many didn't even last 30 seconds under the sharp eyes of the shadow king and cutting tongues of the mischievous devil types. The experimental enlistment transformed into a brilliantly entertaining farce. 

Once the hour of madness had ended, Kyouya, always the last to leave, was on the verge of exiting the music room to rendezvous with his chauffer downstairs, when a pathetic sniffle sounded from the corner of the behemoth room. Tamaki was in full King Emo mode with his head against his knees and a cloud hovering above him, but not bringing any attention to himself. With an irritated flick of his eyes to his wristwatch, Kyouya decided that the matter would probably be best left alone and departed, figuring Tamaki would get over their Seniors leaving with the passage of time.

Answering his phone efficiently that very night, Kyouya listened to Tamaki brainstorm more ideas for recruitment, using only a phrase to dismiss them all for the sheer absurdity that many were. "Tamaki, we cannot properly evaluate prospective Hosts so early in the school year. Middle school grades and entrance examinations do not necessarily parallel with future achievements, and the progress reports aren't due out for another week."

"You're right. I'll think of something!" With that, the Host King hung up.

Kyouya thought nothing of it, and continued working on his differential calculus homework.

The next day, after classes had ended, on their way to Music Room 3 in a thankfully empty hall, Tamaki was waving a small, white stick at Kyouya, who realized on closer inspection was a cheap pregnancy test. At that point, Kyouya recognized how desperately Tamaki was grabbing for ideas if he was divining the future with something so crude.

Then the next words came out of his mouth, "Kyouya! I'm pregnant!!"

The vice president of the Host Club stilled, and then the eye twitching began, but he knew better than to argue with lunacy. "Oh? Who's the father?"

"Oh. …" There was a finger on his lips as the president thought hard about it. "I guess that would be me!"

"…" Kyouya was not about to explain the sexual mechanisms of the human body to someone as bright as Tamaki, and so turned and walked away as the madman raved on about how beautiful his baby son would be and so forth.

"H-hey! Kyouya! It's the truth! The commoner pregnancy test said so!!" Without further askance, Tamaki shoved the stick into Kyouya's field of vision.

Humoring him, Kyouya took it and closely scrutinized it. With a sigh, he handed it back to the hopeful 'mother to be'. "You are not pregnant."

"O-of course I am, the line is very—"

"That is an evaporation line from your urine sample." Kyouya adjusted his glasses. "Besides, men are incapable of producing the necessary hormones to make a true positive."

Saying nothing, his best friend deflated cupping the test in hand with a kicked-puppy look.

"What in the world compelled you to subject yourself to a pregnancy test?" He expected Tamaki to proclaim that he wanted to have children, a naïve wish brought on by hormones no doubt.

"The legacy of the Host Club must be ensured in the future of our children!"

Nearly tripping himself because of the bizarre paths of reasoning that Tamaki's overly imaginative mind had to have taken to get there, Kyouya tightly composed his body language. There were more practical ways at arriving at that destination without resorting to preposterous fantasy that would need years to fulfill, but as usual Tamaki couldn't seem to help himself. The doors to the unused Music Room pushed open.

"Oh, how are you planning that, your majesty?" The Twins piped in, regrettably only having heard the end of the conversation.

"We must find wives and have beautiful sons!!"

Hikaru and Kaoru dotted at that staring at Tamaki as if he had grown a second head that began spouting an alien language. "Surely you jest, King of Fools! We are bachelors, not claimed by anyone as long as we want!"

"No, no! In order for our club to prosper, we must sacrifice our selfish ways. I know this will be hard, but think of the children!"

"And Haruhi would be finding a husband, I take?" Kaoru asked innocently.

"NO, FATHER WILL NOT PERMIT THIS!"

"Permit what, Senior?" The natural type had decided to find out what the fuss was about and so stood next to the entrance beside the twins.

"Ah, well you see.." Tamaki began nervously fiddling with the pregnancy test, "Daddy says that you shouldn't worry about that…"

"What his royal highness said—"

"s-SO..don't listen to what they're saying! Cover your ears, my daughter!" Having begun weakly and ended strong, Tamaki launched himself at her, his hands outstretched as if he were about to do just that. Haruhi stepped aside as Tamaki flew past her. "You were saying, Hikaru?"

"He is suggesting you pair up with a guy and breed. Isn't that right?" Hikaru said conspiratorially, his and his brother's grins widening as Tamaki in a whining fit of denial flopped about like a fish.

"Oh, well of course, Tamaki-senior would suggest such outdated practices like _slavery._ He lacks ethics." She noticed then the pregnancy test in Tamaki's hand, and immediately her thoughts condensed as she deadpanned at his stupidity assuming like a rational being that the test was for someone not-male in the club. "Tamaki-senior, you were going to include something obscene into today's activities, weren't you?"

Suddenly realizing what was in his hands and waving it around, Tamaki stuttered turning bright red. "N-no! Daddy would never allow that to happen!! This was for me!"

He rendered her utterly speechless. She didn't know whether to believe him or reject what he was saying for lies.

"What is he holding, Kaoru?"

"I have no idea. It looks too small to be a bedroom-only toy."

Kyouya spoke up nonchalantly, interrupting their loudly whispered conversation. "It is a commoner pregnancy test. After relieving himself on the strip, he believed he was pregnant. To which I convinced him he was not."

The Twins were on the floor laughing their heads off and bantering back and forth of the sheer heights the idiocy of his highness had taken.

Sighing, Haruhi leaned over to Tamaki who was still sitting on the ground depressed. "At least wait until you graduate to consider being a real father, Tamaki."

At that, he clutched his breast above his heart and bemoaned Haruhi's cruelty. Haruhi merely stared at him not sure what he was going on about.

Finally, Kyouya clapped his notebook close. "What our President is worrying about is the collapse of the Host Club. First, we need to find an effective recruitment process if we wish for our bountiful club to continue through the years, and then I suggest we hold an election amongst our clientele to discover which Host would hold the presidential position as well as my post upon our graduation."

"Brilliant!" The King stood up gallantly commending the plan of action as if it was his own idea.

"shadow king." Haruhi muttered darkly. Kyouya merely smiled overhearing her continuing, "I'll make a form to apply for Hosting and a rubric to score which traits would fit under which Type."

"Great, we'll do the advertising!" Hikaru grinned roping an arm around Kaoru's neck.

"I suppose I'll go do homework, since I don't really care."

Tamaki gasped dramatically with a stricken look on his face. "Wh-why Haruhi? After all we've been through as father and daughter…"

The Twins laughed. "She was coerced into becoming a Host, of course she wouldn't want to prolong the Host Club's existence."

Adjusting his glasses, Kyouya smiled congenially. "Are you thinking that 'If this club didn't exist, I wouldn't have to pay back my debt'?"

The Natural Type looked stonily at him.

"Unfortunately that would not be the case. You would be working part-time as a rotating servant to our households until you graduate since we collectively paid your debt."

Her look turned aghast imagining the trouble it would be to be slaving away for some rich guys who could afford a squadron of maids. No, she definitely preferred being a Host. Her smile barely contained her annoyance. "What do you suggest my job is?"

A deep rumbling overtook the marble floor as the whirring of an electric engine was brought to life. The Hosts walked in closing the doors as not to air anymore dirty laundry. An all-too-familiar cackling over took the room as Renge's spinning pedestal stopped high above them. "Oh my dear Haruhi!" She crooned. "You will be the bait to lure the unsuspecting qualifying Hosts in!"

Haruhi frowned. "Bait?"

"Perhaps that ruffian would do as the Soft-hearted Boorish type? Or perhaps our club will discover The Hidden Noblity type!" With another series of laughs her platform descended, leaving Haruhi and the Twins puzzled by her cryptic titles.

"If she's talking about Bossanova, hell no."

"I couldn't agree more. But, Hidden Nobility type, whatever could she be going off about? Do we know anyone like that?"

Their King's deep voice and demeanor took them off guard, as if he were suddenly on a mission at their darkest hour. Kyouya merely shifted feet, observing the changes and saying nothing.

"If the manageress means I would submit to the Underlord, I answer 'Cake or DEATH'!!" Then Tamaki's eyes watered as he remembered who had been so fond of cake. "Oh Honey-senior. If only you and Mori-senior were here, we would not have to resort to such caricature that changes the very nature of our institution!"

Still quite puzzled, Haruhi asked, "The Underlord?

"I feel ill! I cannot partake of this luscious cake that mocks my pain and undue suffering!" Tamaki continued, talking to the richly decorated Castella cake that sat in rows of other treats for their club activity that sat in front of him.

"We should find suitable candidates from the Freshman pool as it would do us no favor to add more members our age when we graduate by the end of the year." Kyouya remarked coolly. The twins nodded in agreement murmuring a bet towards their shadow king's direction that they would discover proper Host material before anyone else, to which Kyouya readily agreed.

"No! I... I mustn't let the cake go to waste...!!" Their president was apparently in his own world again, taking no heed to the vice-president's words or the wager occurring behind him. "but the Underlord..."

The door opened and their clients streamed in chattering happily amongst themselves, halting when they sensed a dramatic climax was nearing its end.

"Haruhi, take this cake to bait the young men! You are our hook to reel them in as commoner's would say it!"

Their clients went slack-jawed.

"Should we be expecting a fallout, my lord?" The Twins jeered at Tamaki, eyes laughing.

Then a chorus of cheers and whistling bowled over them and the floor rumbled again as an ornately-decorated palanquin arrived again. "Wonderful plan! What a performance!" Renge began a lively applause with her dainty clapping.

"What?" Haruhi looked down at her hand holding the dainty saucer of cake baffled. "I'm supposed to..."

"Woo the Grade A Freshmen in." Hikaru said flatly, having trouble going along with it. Kaoru glanced at his brother, and elbowed him lightly as he smiled at Haruhi. "Casanova is close to the mark, so we know you have it in you, Haruhi!"

"If you do this, your debt will be halved." A cool voice spoke to her left as if whispering a grim detail.

"Fine!"

"Fantastique, Encore, Encore! Let our 'Natural Type Charming Tactics' commence forth!"

Haruhi hung her head feeling the beginning of a migraine begin as the Hosts' customers cackled in glee and Renge laughed in her obnoxious manner.

TBC.


	2. The Truth in Labels

_Author's notes: Sorry for the long wait! I had to develop some OCs. I hope you guys like this chapter!_

_**Warning:** OCs._

_I don't have any more ideas with this plot idea so I'm going to just end it on this chapter. Unless in the unlikely event that another plunnie bites me._

_To reviewers, thank you! I wasn't expecting any feedback at all. _

* * *

Fortunately for Haruhi, the club meeting had just started and there were customers that had prepaid for their services. She was the talk of the day as their clients fawned over the time that Kasanoda had confessed and gotten dumped.

Otherwise the hour went by quickly.

Bidding her lagging clients farewell, Haruhi didn't bother keeping the irritation off her face when a sheet of paper with meticulous writing on it was handed to her by the vice president.

"These are the most likely Freshman candidates. You'll approach the third one on the list. You can't miss him, since he dyed his hair an unusual color." His eyes zinged Renge who hadn't liked that either of her favorites weren't eligible because of their age. "And this is the letter you should give him."

Reading the list, she recognized only Yasuchika, Honey's younger brother, though there was another Morinozuka on it. "Who's Satoshi?"

"Oh, that's Mori's younger brother." The Hitachiin brothers perched over her looking the list over. "What's with the foreigners?"

He shrugged. "It couldn't be helped."

"Ha-neul Fong is a Korean name, isn't it?" Haruhi asked curiously of the third name on the list.

Kyouya adjusted his glasses smiling.

"Aaron Bane. I've heard that name before…" Kaoru looked over at his twin, who shrugged.

"Recently there was an incident that left the world-renowned Bane Corporation without an owner. His older brother Orwin transferred into your class. Their father never married so succession hasn't been decided."

They shrugged unenthusiastically.

Haruhi looked up realizing something was very, very wrong. "Where's Tamaki?"

They all turned as if just then noticing that their President was missing. They were silent as they thought about it.

"He probably wandered off." Hikaru shrugged, but Haruhi had a nagging feeling in her gut. She had learned to pay attention to her intuition with that crazy president, but business came first as per usual. "So, where can I find Ha-neul?"

"His class is 1-A. He spends his free time in the reading rooms. He's a notorious bookworm, but he's probably gone for the day," replied the nonplussed voice.

"Fine. I'm going home, too."

"We'll give you a ride Haruhi!" The Twins offered in unison.

"No thanks. I can take the bus." Nonetheless they escorted her out, bantering back and forth.

Kyouya turned to the empty room, expecting his classmate, but knowing he wasn't present. He left thinking the blonde had gone home to sulk, not aware of Tamaki's real location.

An eye peered out of the door that had always been there. "I must ensure the prosperity of my club, Nekozawa-senior."

"Bezelneef will help with that." The Black Magic Club president wheezed his laughter out like a demented animal.

A shiver ran up Tamaki's spine as he tensed, though he tried to remain relaxed. "Yes. Or I may hold myself back like you did."

"I'm afraid that I was so dedicated that I neglected my studies. But it's for the best." Kneeling at his altar with lit purple-flamed candles, he moaned like a man in pain. "No, no this will do no good! We need a sacrifice!"

"S-s-s-sacrifice?"

"Yes." Nekozawa rattled out a slivery laugh. "A great sacrifice in order for Bezelneef's power to truly come to life. The only way is for you to become an acolyte! Come to the darkness, junior."

Lightning flashed dramatically behind Tamaki as he inched towards the door. "Ah?"

"Where are you going, my virgin sacrifice?" The puppet convulsed in his face. Tamaki screamed, ripping the door open and ran out as Nekozawa cackled softly only one eye exposed in the candlelight.

--

The next day before school started Haruhi went into her old homeroom, putting a hand on her hip at the teen with piercing coal-black eyes, his hair a snowy blue color. At least it wasn't Flamingo Pink. "Hi. I'm Haruhi Fujioka, a junior. I was told to give this to you." She extended the letter and placed it on his desk, leaving without another word. As Freshman girls wondered aloud if it was a love letter.

He looked the envelope over, opening it. When the bell rang, he slipped it into his book as class began.

Precisely at three in the afternoon, Ha-neul walked into the third music room.

"Welcome!"

His shoulder-length hair fluttered in the breeze of rose petals, as he stared impassively across the room at the Hosts.

"This must be Little Cloud!" Hikaru whispered loudly to his twin, who nodded.

"Welcome, O Future Host!" Their president upraised both his hands bowing with a flourish of his wrist. "We have prepared some instant coffee for you."

"…" He stepped in, the door closing behind him, and sat at the couch as Haruhi offered him cookies, but he shook his head to decline them.

"Mama, I think he needs a lovely item. He's permafrost."

Kyouya merely smirked, as the double doors slammed open, but Ha-neul narrowed his eyes as he looked at the youth breathing hard.

"Mitsukuni! You dare show your face—!" Yasuchika Haninozuka looked about, and seemed to deflate a bit as he held up a small card angered. "Who sent this?!"

"Won't you have some coffee, Yasuchika-kun?" Haruhi asked calmly. "It's very bitter. Probably to your taste."

An irritated noise was his response, but he sat down nonetheless drinking it with relish. "What brand is this?"

"A commoner coffee called Hescafe, oh young one!" Tamaki fluttered to and fro not sure which he liked better.

Yasuchika heh'ed at him. "So you tricked me here because…?"

"For the future of this club!"

The door creaked open again as a teen of medium height stepped in, shaggy brown hair with reddish brown eyes and a heart-shaped face.

"Now here's a real girly boy!" The twins said together, leaning against each other. "You must be Bane-kun?"

"Yes, I received an invitation…?" A shy voice stated quietly.

"You've come to the right place! This way, this way!" And so, the scrawny heir-apparent was pushed by Tamaki into the couch next to Yasuchika who gave him an appraising look. "You're familiar…" He received a blank, unhelpful look.

"Would you like some coffee, Bane-kun?" Haruhi offered politely.

"No thanks. I hate coffee."

"I'm sorry I'm late please don't kill me! Oh, hi Yasuchika!" A head peered from the doorway, then a tall gangly guy stepped in. Other than his height he had otherwise unmemorable Japanese features. "So… I heard there was a party? Is it ok I brought a friend?" He tugged in another nondescript teen, who wasn't wearing the uniform and only smiled and waved lightly.

The Twins frowned at the unknown teen's raggy appearance, but weren't curious enough to ask already bored with the Freshman candidates.

"Oh! Every day is a party at the Host Club, Satoshi-kun and Nameless Boy! There's free food and refreshments as long as you are willing to service customers with your natural qualities!" As Morinozuka's little brother and his friend sat on the other side of Haruhi, who offered them coffee, Tamaki snapped his fingers, and a rumbling sound overtook the room as steel binders suddenly dropped in front of the doors and steel blinds slid over the windows. A bright spotlight illuminated the chair high above them. Renge's typical laughter was missing.

"You!" A light shone down on Satoshi who blinked up at the spotlight puzzled. "Me…?"

"You've got a massive friend complex due to past ties between your families! Always striving to hone your charge's character and intellect, you are the Knight Type!!" Kyouya scribbled in his notebook. Sometimes it seemed she'd make things up to justify her otakuism. However, her outlandish claims were a hit a third of the time and that couldn't be ignored.

But the 'Knight Type' had gotten distracted halfway through, standing next to Honey's younger brother only giving Aaron a cursory glance and nodding towards Haruhi before looking back down at him. "Chika, it's not like you to skip out on club activities! What's wrong? Do you miss your brother?"

"HELL NO!!"

"Yasuchika Haninozuka!"

Renge pointed at the youth, who squawked "I AM NOT A HOST" in an undignified manner.

"You are the Martial Arts Type. You don't care about romance, only looking forward to the next brawl until a lady falls in love with you. Your tragedy is your self-centered nature!!"

"SCREW THIS." Slamming the teacup and saucer down, Yasuchika stormed out tearing through the metal with a well-placed kick, Satoshi tearing after him a wooden sword in hand furious at his destructive habits his new friend obviously forgotten. "CHIKA! STOP TAKING YOUR ANGER OUT ON PROPERTY!"

"Oh well. I can't help men who disqualify themselves." Renge held her hands up in a helpless shrug.

The Twins, Tamaki, and Haruhi looked at the teen left behind who continued smiling.

"I guess your friendship was shallow." The Twins deadpanned, but the teen said nothing in his defense, and they sulked at his non-reaction. Haruhi looked towards the door and back at the teen. She only began to introduce herself before Renge continued her loud spiel, attention centered on the Korean. "You are the Nerdy Mute Type. Never speaking, only striving for a knowledge that only you can understand. Your life is a miserable existence for you are an orphan and the only person who loves you is your older sister, who departed this world due to a mysterious illness!"

"…" Ha-neul merely looked at her with an upraised eyebrow under the sudden glaring light above him.

"Oh! You continue your sad journey in search of someone to care for!" Renge sniffled outrageously, but the crocodile tears disappeared when the spotlight moved to Aaron who winced holding a hand up against it. "Geez. Could you tone it down?"

"Embroiled in a bitter battle over a company that your father has left behind, you are hounded by assassins hired by distant relatives who hope to get it for themselves! You hate your brother. You hate your life. You are the Emo Type!!"

The boy looked at her as if she had some bolts missing from her skull.

"And you, Mysterious Boy!"

"My name is Koichi Ota."

"Whatever! Your trait is an easy laidback nature. You are constantly trying to get others to laugh and lighten up with your down-to-earth ways. Your downfall is that every girl sees you as a friend or a brother! You are always left behind when people find their own happiness! You are the Boy-Next-Door Type!"

"Hey, she's pretty good at this." Koichi grinned.

"Please don't encourage her." The Natural type nearly groaned out.

Renge put a hand to her chest with a slightly swooning sound. "And that smile!"

Kyouya frowned flipping through his folder obviously disturbed that he had never heard of the Ota family in terms of the elite. He however knew of the name's prevalence among commonfolk. 'Mysterious' indeed. Those clothes were a sign that he probably wasn't a student here.

"Preliminary Type-fixturing complete! Now I leave the interview process to the greatly successful vice president!" With a series of laughs Renge's platform descended and the floor returned to normal.

Kyouya directed his attention to the group. "Ha-neul, will you be staying for the duration of your high school career?"

"…" There was a very curt nod.

The president interrupted abruptly. "You know, your hair is just a little too long—!" A suddenly sharp glare stopped his words in his tracks. "A-at least pull it up into a ponytail?" Tamaki whimpered when he was ignored.

"Would you be willing to play the mime in our 'Side Show Freaks' Event coming up?"

Seeming also to ignore Kyouya, Ha-neul reached for something, closing his hand on air, and with a tug had little difficulty dragging the 'object' near him. Opening it with a zipper-like motion he pulled out something rectangular from it, unfolding it and setting it in his lap, as he looked down with interest at nothing, and licked a thumb to turn invisible pages as his eyes scanned down.

"Ohhhhh! Excellent miming technique! What a master." Tamaki clapped lightly. Ha-neul continued turning the pages of a non-existent book, while Aaron snacked heavily on the cookies.

"Koichi, are you even enrolled in our school?" The Twins sidled up to him, plucking at his clothes. "You haven't mistaken Ouran for Ourin?"

"I just transferred! I don't really have any school records since I was home-schooled a lot. My parents couldn't afford enough gas to take me to grade school so I was kicked out."

"Is he listening to himself? He sounds even poorer than Haruhi!" Hikaru commented loudly to his twin. "As if that happens in our day and age!"

"Hey!!" Haruhi growled at them. "I am not 'poor'."

The twins smiled. "Compared to us you are!"

"What company does your family own, Ota?" Kyouya interrupted the idle bickering, adjusting his glasses joining the Twins in a pincer technique to break the teen's story for the well-managed lie it must be.

"Own? Haha! That's a good one! My parents actually adopted me. One's a psychic and the other handles computer maintenance! It took me fifteen years of hard work to finally afford this school, though I had to take out a loan since the price went up since I first started. It's great so far, even though I'm in class 1-D. I fear for my life everyday because of the gangster kids!"

The Hosts looked at him with varying expression ranging from disbelief to dismay.

"My name's Haruhi Fujioka, Ota."

"Nice to meet you, Fujioka-senior."

"I'm Aaron Bane." The boy next to Haruhi stated quietly, and received a similar response, while Ha-neul said nothing his mime gag still running.

"A c-c-commoner!! HOW SPLENDID!" Their president exclaimed.

"Commoner? What are you, Lords? I thought the only lines that hadn't died out were really traditional family types… and you don't even look ethnically Japanese." Koichi asked outloud as if contemplating deeply on Tamaki's commentary.

Ignoring the bit about his ethnic heritage Tamaki spun around and presented Haruhi with a flourish. "Haruhi is a commoner as well though she's on scholarship!"

"Oh wow, really? I'm impressed. You have to be at the top of the top, am I right?" He smiled at her.

"Yes." She smiled back. "Would you like more coffee?" She offered the extremely expensive looking teapot when he nodded cheerfully and offered his used but empty teacup.

"Hey, hey. You aren't one of those _homo_ types are you?" Hikaru leaned in between his crush and the invader. "We've already got that covered, right Kaoru?"

"Oh, Hikaru!" Karou leaned against him as they embraced, faces barely apart, and completely blocking any view the two commoners shared with each other.

Koichi whistled with a hand under his chin. "Sure are taking advantage of those naughty girls' imaginations huh? You're pretty good at fake incestuous love."

"How dare you think, _this_, is fake!" Kaoru said as his lips barely touched Hikaru's cheek, who blushed reflexively.

They were waved off. "Right, right. Hey, Bane. Isn't that British?"

"Uh… Canadian French." The mostly ignored, very quiet boy sat uncomfortably on the chair, the tray emptied of cookies.

"Oh, like from Canada. Your Japanese is really good for a foreigner."

The boy scowled and looked away.

""I'm not familiar with that dialect of French you just used, Mysterious Ota!" Their president postured.

"Oh… Ah. Haha." He laughed nervously in response. Their vice president furiously wrote the suspicious conversation down in his notes.

"Quebec French is a bastardization of Parisian French." The Emo Type grumbled.

"Bane, will you be leaving from our school any time soon?" Kyouya asked quietly.

"Only when I graduate."

"Fabulous!" With a clap all the blinders removed themselves. "Now for the next order of business—"

"GET DOWN." Aaron yelled standing up suddenly as an innocuous clatter sounded and a metal can rolled in. He ran across the spotless floor as a small explosion went off spreading heavy oily smoke everywhere.

Kyouya was immediately on his phone calling for his security guards.

There were sounds of a scuffle ahead of them as skin contacted skin in a series of punches or kicks. They were all coughing at the smoke in the room. The Twins hit a red button on the wall that opened all the windows.

As the smoke cleared, Aaron was seen pinning a black-clothed man facedown, a foot on an outreached hand and a 9mm a foot away from that, his own hands hitting pressure points at the elbow and wrist as he dug it into the intruder's spine. "Owowowowowo, Uncle! Uncle! Aaron, get off of me please? I'm sorry, I just wanted to scare you!"

"Personal bodyguard or not, you're an ass."

"But you left me at home, what was I supposed to do? I needed to check their security!"

"You're a butler. Act like one!"

"Obviously, you found weaknesses that we had not anticipated. If you would, please describe them in detail before my associates escort you off of the premises." His guards surrounded him ready to assist just that. "I apologize Bane, but you are disqualified from participating in the Host Club due to the potential danger to our customers. I'll be sure to ask for extra security around your homeroom for the length of your education here."

"Fine with me. It was interesting while it lasted, but as for the guards I don't need them. I was waiting for the paperwork to be approved before I brought my own private guard in." He released the man and put a foot on his other hand before it had grabbed his ankle. "Please take this stalker off my hands. Nice meeting you all." He bowed and hastily exited.

"k-kyouyaaaaa…" The president blubbered as another could-be Host left, while the man who had been pinned and stomped on whined 'aarrroooon' petulantly.

The Vice President smiled. "Tamaki, I have other club duties to attend to, so please continue the interview process." With a short glance at his guards, he walked calmly to the door as his guards manhandled and dragged the man kicking and screaming "Nooo, don't let them take me!" through the door.

The Twins merely watched the chaos, and then Kaoru snapped his fingers. "Bane Corporation has a global market in butler and maid services, though they're really hired hands specializing in protection services. We've hired their services once or twice in the past."

"Wow." The talkative of the two remaining candidate Hosts breathed out.

"Things are usually more insane and less violent." Haruhi stated calmly.

"Awesome!"

"Huhhhh?!" Haruhi couldn't wipe the gape off her face.

"You're absolutely right!" Tamaki spun around, and brought his hand to his chin in a daring grin. "Our job is to bring good fortune to all the girls around! It is a noble goal for which I, the King of this Host Club, laid out in the very beginning!"

"I'm in, I'm in! Please teach me King-senior!"

"Very well! And you Ha-neul? Do you agree to make girls happy?"

"…" Ha-neul stared at him.

"I'll take that as a yes! Welcome to the Host Club, Ha-neul Fong and Koichi Ota!"

And the double doors burst open as the girls swarmed in surrounding and congratulating the two new inductees.

**End**.


End file.
